So here I am again telling stories of my life since I’m too bored with it. I know me and bff has a scheduled training for an upcoming event so we decided that we will not get drunk last Thursday. Unfortunately bff couldn’t resist the temptation so I gave in as well. We drank Thursday night with the gang and well I’ve set my mind that I can’t get drunk since we both have jobs the next morning. Bff’s boytoy came along so they left a bit earlier than expected. I asked bff if she was still going to the training and she said yes. Surprisingly the drinking session lasted till five in the morning and surprisingly I was not drunk, not at all. So me and bro got home by six and I still got an hour to spare. So I first heated some water for my coffee, sent my CV’s to 2 e-mails which was given to me early Thursday while I was scavenging for work, and took a shower. I finished preparing around quarter to seven and left. I arrived at the assembly point exactly seven o’clock. Two bus we’re waiting filled with people who will undergo the training as well. Bff arrived 10 minutes after me and we seated together. Since the training ground is still a bit far we decided to take a power nap inside the bus. After a grueling one hour of sleeping in the most uncomfortable position for me (yeah I can’t really sleep while sitting… but I guess it can’t be helped). We arrived at the training grounds and we were briefed about the job and place of the event. Training commenced from nine am till one pm in the afternoon. Bff and I planned to take lunch and have coffee after just to chill out and talk about stuff. Plan went on smoothly and my ex wanted to have coffee as well so we told him he can follow us at the café. Before my ex came we were actually talking about you (yeah you know who you are my little one. Haha!), like how much I missed you and what plans I have when you come back. So after the long conversation about all things under the sun me and bff decided to go home (yeah both of us were like drained of all the energy that’s within us). So while walking to the area where Cabs Park, both of them was like talking about their career and stuff. It suddenly hit me. I asked myself, “What have I achieved in this life so far?” I stayed quiet till I got a cab. My whole body which was already starting to feel the strain because of being deprived of sleep suddenly felt number, my chest suddenly felt heavier and next thing I knew I was crying. Crying because I couldn’t give any answer to my question earlier. I couldn’t stop it. When I got home it got worse. I was unpacking my stuff and when I pulled out one of my clothes the one and only rosary I had in my life popped out. Could this be a sign? I changed to my pajamas and shirt, sat on the bed and held to the rosary. My heart suddenly pounded harder and I cried harder. I couldn’t help it anymore, how much I pity myself and my current situation. I decided to cut off myself from the world for the meantime so I deactivated one of my major social networking site. I cried myself to sleep while hugging the pillow with your shirt on (oh I washed it already btw. Haha. I don’t think it’s still hygienic to let it stay on the pillow for the third week so I washed it last week). All I could say at this kind of times are “Wish you were here” because I know that I can always hug you and kiss you and when you tell me things will be fine I know they will be. You give me the feeling of being safe amidst all the turmoil and chaos of my mind. I miss you and I love you.
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