I guess first impressions do really last if you want them to. This day has been busy since it was my first day of training a day after my interview with the company's management. I do have some friends over at another department and they keep telling me how the operations manager and assistant general manager was impressed with me. I guess it helps when you stop overdoing things and just be yourself. When the operations manager started the interview he told me that there's no hierarchy at the time that were doing the interview so I should feel free to say what I want to say and treat him as a friend. I guess that helped me to relax a bit and stop pressuring myself to land the job. It's true that when you are overwhelmed with your emotions about stuff you can make more mistakes. Being composed, relaxed, calm and objective about things is what you need to be in times of great distress and turmoil. Being jobless for months has been taxing and well pretty much a waste of time. Though I never regret the experiences and the times I shared with my friends and loved ones at those very moments. You really feel the love of the people around you when you got nothing and still they stick with you. It gives more meaning to camaraderie and companionship. That's why I never want to be put in a situation where I have to choose between my friends and my love one. It will always be a decision at which I don't ever want to make. I treat my friends as family as well, so that's like making me choose between my brothers or sisters and my love. It's something I know well within myself that I can't live without. Living my life for the past twenty two years has been all about loving. Loving my family, the way I suit myself up, the way I act towards other people, the food, the drinks, the good, bad and worse times, the ones I love, loved and will be loving. I love to love. There's too much love to give so why not just smother everyone with it. Be thankful for those who'll take it and appreciate it. For those who wont appreciate it leave them alone. They have their own reasons and you know very well that we can't please everybody. I'm not quite sure if it actually makes sense that you are "In love with Love itself" but I think that is what I've been into these past few years. Being so overwhelmed with the feeling of love does have it's own pros and cons. That's why I have decided to change my ways recently and make it "a subtle obsession" I still like the feeling and will do things for me to keep feeling it, but I will have to keep myself on the ground and stop myself from being swept away too much. It's not suppose to be the whole meal in life instead it should be an ingredient that keeps life tasty and full of flavors. Being out of the virtual world for the rest of the day gives me this sudden urge to burst out words that I know may or may not make sense at all. Babble random stuffs that people might already know and may simple ignore this piece of crap. But hey I'm still proud of myself not everyone will make and effort to jot down random thoughts that pop into their head. They are underestimating the most powerful substance in the world. The human mind. Who knows that maybe one day I bang my head on a wall because of a perfectly well diagnosed insanity and loose all my memory. This might help me recover my memories and help me go back to who I really was, but then again I might fall into the same pattern of banging my head on the wall (yeah I was trying to be funny a bit back there haha!). But still it might be helpful not only to me but others as well. You never really know when someone is actually moved and influenced by the way you think. That is how powerful the human psyche is!
"Obsession is the highest level & form of missing a person. It can induce both fear & amazement."
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